Three ways to maximise your single life in 2023

I have heard people say 2020 was a difficult year for single women.

Do you agree?

It’s true that the restrictions on movement meant there were limited opportunities to meet other people.

How did you navigate your love life with everything that was going on in 2020? You probably have some stories to tell, and I hope we catch up soon.

Recently, I was thinking about how to maximise my life.

This is a phrase we often hear and may have used ourselves though we may not have articulated it clearly. I realised that I had to be clear about what maximising means to me – accepting my reality while also making the most of the present.

The reality is that quite a few of us are still single (probably to the consternation of our friends and loved ones, and ourselves, if we are being totally honest).

But if there’s one thing the pandemic has taught us, it is the need to make the most of our lives, whether single or married. The pandemic is a reminder that life is short, and we have every reason to live with more courage and less regret.

Buoyed by this, I came up with three important tips for making the most of our singleness in 2021. They are – having a growth mindset, taking charge of our finances and building our communities or support system.

 

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Three ways to maximise your single life in 2021

Here are three useful tips to live a full and fulfilling life as a single woman.

1. Have a growth mindset

How are you developing yourself? What are the things you are learning today for the benefit of the future you?

In the last year, I have read over 100 books. Yes, you read that right. This was an unexpected but wonderful feat, but it also came at a cost (one I will happily pay, again and again). It came at the cost of social media.

In 2019, I left Instagram and I haven’t been back since. I didn’t even realise how much time I was spending until I left. How about you? Perhaps you never seem to have any time to do things you want to do.

It may be time to cut back on the things you want for the things you need.

Having a growth mindset means making room to learn new things, and to learn from new situations.

Take time to reflect on what skills you need to develop.

Right now, I am also trying to learn new things. Here is the thing – don’t just do it because that what you’ve been told or because you want to be an ‘asset’ to the man you marry. Do it for yourself.

Do it as a Christ’s steward on earth making the most of the gifts and talents, He has bestowed on you. Build and develop those things he has put in you.

In a previous post, I mentioned six skills you should be developing in 2021. You can start there, or also consider other skills or things you’ve always wanted to learn. Perhaps it’s learning a new language to improve your social, personal and intuitive skills.

I have also shared 25 productivity ideas for single women and 20 things you can do as a single woman. There are so many amazing things you can do in 2021.

Don’t waste these opportunities!

2. Take charge of your finances

“Because of laziness the building decays, and through idleness of hands, the house leaks. A feast is made for laughter, and wine make merry; but money answers everything.”

Ecclesiastes 10: 18-19 (NKJV)

 I don’t know about you, but I used to have a love-hate relationship with money. Some may say I still do. Lol

When I started my career, I worked as a financial lawyer and even started a personal finance blog, so you could say I know a bit about money. This year, I believe we need to take control of our finances. Perhaps, your circumstances have changed since the pandemic started – some lost their jobs, while others started new jobs and businesses. No matter where you stand, here are two steps to taking control of your finances:

• Physical control of finances

This speaks to the practical things you can do to manage your money better. I will share a few below:

Saving.

Saving is a no-brainer; you have probably heard that enough times. There is a famous quote, says

“Do not save what is left after spending; instead spend what is left after saving.”

Warren Buffet

I know it’s easier said than done but it is not impossible. The trick is usually to start small. One thing the pandemic has taught us is that we can get by with less stuff than we thought. We don’t need as much clothing, makeup and furniture. These are places you can start cutting out today. You can also automate your savings and round up change from your expenses. I use the Revolut app for this and its been great.

 

Investing.

Investing is our means of building on what we have saved. There are many investment ideas out there. You can invest in:

Private/small Businesses

Real Estate

The stockmarket

Cryptocurreny and precious metals

Peer to peer lending platforms etc

Before you invest, do some research. I have also been advised to invest in companies I like or in areas I’m interested in.

  

Budgeting

Budgeting is a way to create a plan for your income and expenses. This gives you a snapshot of what is coming in and what you’re spending on. Find ways to cut your expenses as this is major way to increase your saving and to build wealth.

 

• Spiritual control of finances

A few years ago, God re-oriented my relationship with money. I learned that while money is important, the most important thing is to never confuse our source from our means. I had to learn that God is truly our source and he is the one that blesses us through different ways – salary, gifts, etc.

This means that no matter where we are, we must seek his blessing and his counsel in how we make and spend our money. Through prayer we can get insight into ways to generate income or invest, and even receive strength to save. Please don’t ignore this spiritual side.

3. Build your community

The most important member of your support group is the Holy Spirit. He is our advocate, our helper, our comforter, our strength and our hiding place. He is literally our No.1 fan.

“And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that he may abide with you forever.”

John 14:16

That’s right! God has sent the Holy Spirit to abide with us forever.

How amazing, right?

So, no matter what you do, start by building your community with the Holy spirit in his rightful place.

Secondly, you also need the people God has placed around you.

This is not the year to avoid friends and family because you don’t want the pity and questions about your singleness. No, this year, you are going to stand strong and embrace not only your status, but those God has connected with you with.

Many of the people that ask about our love life mean well, even though they often say the wrong things. I am learning that the best way to respond is with love. Hold up! I know it is not easy. I will be the first to tell you that! But it sure is worth it.

2020 has shown us the power of community and how lonely it can be when we try to do life alone. Yes, you can create boundaries but don’t let love rather than fear and anxiety dictate your boundaries.

 

There you have it, three ways to maximise your life this year.

Which one of these would you start with? Do you have other tips to help us make the most of the year? Please share in the comments.