I remember listening to a story by a Christian Youtuber who shared that when she got engaged, the Lord impressed upon her heart not to have sex with her fiance. It wasn’t like she had planned to, but the imprint was so strong that during a moment of weakness, when she may have otherwise succumbed, that reminder helped her stay on course. And years later, she realised that God was saving her and her husband, as the enemy had wanted to use that as an entry into their home.
Perhaps, you’re reading this and wondering what the big deal is. You may also believe that she was over spiritualising her experience, but as someone who has faced serious spiritual attacks in the last few years, I know and understand what she means.
What we often do not realise is that some sins open doors that cannot be shut simply from a confession and forgiveness.
But that is a story for another day.
For today, I am here to remind you to remain spiritually vigilant when you get engaged.
Engagement is often painted as the season where couples act like they’re “almost married.” The rings are on, the wedding date is set, and the countdown begins. But here’s the truth: engagement is not a rehearsal for marriage. It is not the time to test-run intimacy, blur boundaries, or live as if the covenant has already been sealed.
If anything, engagement is a season of clarity, preparation, and intentionality.
1. Engagement is a season of building foundations
Think of your engagement as a bridge. You’re leaving the land of singleness, but you haven’t yet arrived at the covenant of marriage. This in-between space is precious because it allows you to ask hard questions, seek wise counsel, and strengthen your relationship with God and each other before making lifelong vows.
“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”
Proverbs 15:22
2. Purity still matters
One of the most common temptations in engagement is letting physical intimacy slip beyond God’s boundaries. The world says, “You’re practically married, so why wait?” But God’s word hasn’t changed. Song of Solomon warns us not to “awaken love before its time.” (Song 2:7)
Purity is not about punishment. It’s about protecting the beauty of God’s design for sex within covenant. Choosing purity in engagement strengthens trust, discipline, and respect for each other.
3. Engagement is a season of intentional prayer
This is not just about praying for a perfect wedding day. It’s about praying into your future home, your spiritual life together, your finances, your extended families, and your legacy.
Imagine two farmers planting before a harvest. Engagement is the planting season — what you sow now, in prayer and discipline, you will reap later in marriage.
“Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.”
Psalm 127:1
4. Engagement tests commitment, not convenience
The excitement of wedding planning can sometimes overshadow the reality of preparing for marriage. Engagement will expose how you both handle stress, finances, family dynamics, and expectations. Don’t shy away from these moments. They are not signs to run but opportunities to grow in sacrifice and submission, the very things marriage will require daily.
“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
Ephesians 5:21
5. Guard your village
Engagement is also the season when everyone suddenly has an opinion. Some advice will be wise. Some will be cultural noise. This is why surrounding yourself with mentors, spiritual covering, and godly friendships is so important. Not every voice deserves a seat at your table in this delicate season.
Preparation not Practice
Your engagement is not “practice marriage.” It is preparation. It is a call to be intentional, prayerful, and pure as you step into the covenant God designed.
So if you are engaged, don’t treat this as a rehearsal. Treat it as a sacred invitation to build, to pray, and to prepare for the lifelong journey ahead.
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