What’s the worst that could happen? This was a question I was afraid to contemplate much more answer. I believed it was better to hide, to cover up and to act like I had it all together.
I didn’t want to think about what I had done. I had let myself down I had shut myself out from others as I was scared of what they would see if they looked too deeply. I had messed up big time and I knew God wasn’t happy with me. Though I had asked for forgiveness, I refused to believe I had been forgiven.
In my way, I had created my own cage and shackled myself to the chains of guilt and despair. I couldn’t even consider the freedom his words promised, how could I be free with my mistake hanging in front of me and the regret not too far behind?
This was a bondage I remained in until I finally asked myself the question that had held me down, the question that my shame wouldn’t let me answer: What’s the worst that could happen?
People may be disappointed, they may avoid you, insult you but really, what’s the worst that could happen? By answering this I realised that things are never as bad as they seem.
I found relief when I stopped holding on to the secrets and pretense. I felt whole when I allowed my vulnerability to show but more than that, I felt alive when I realised that the shame of my past could only manifest in secrecy. That I had grown and learnt from my mistakes so could no longer be tied to a past I had moved from.
It takes courage to be free
I share these to let you know that it’s okay. May be you have been hiding your true self, afraid of what people will say when they hear about these things. May be you have been hiding because of how you feel about what you did.
I need you to breathe, I need you to let go of the burdens and pains. You need to understand that there is freedom in Christ. This freedom is not as the world gives, but a lasting freedom and wholeness that no one can take away.
“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”
John 8:36
There is no condemnation in Christ for he has set us free from the law of sin and death. Our freedom in Christ also reveals his love for us, a love that is not affected by our past and current mistakes, a love that fills us in spite of our sin and weaknesses.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus.”
Romans 8:38-39
His love calls us back to him, to repentance and trust, knowing that we can do nothing without him.
Dear friend, you can do this, you can live again despite the shame and regrets. But you have to be willing to be vulnerable and unafraid. You have to ask and answer the burning question of ‘what’s the worst that could happen’ knowing that the worst will never be as bad as you fear.
“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
Brené Brown
It’s time to shed the cloak of secrecy and live out your life with purpose and intention. Maybe you have felt unqualified to do certain things or to engage in certain subjects because of your past, well it’s time to change it all for good.
Through the mistakes of my past, I have learned the need to encourage and empower women. I could have chosen and I did choose, in the past, to hide but I thank God for the liberation which came through fellowship with his son, Jesus Christ. Today, I am able to use my story to help and encourage others.
Whatever yours may be, this is your chance to channel it for good. To change lives and mold destines.
You can do this through our Lord who give us strength. Be encouraged!
I love when you stated that, “In my way, I had created my own cage and shackled myself to the chains of guilt and despair.” I lived a life of silencing all the things I have been through for years. I definitely remember feeling this way. I had people in my life that tried to silence me too. Some even told me that some things are better life unsaid. After, meditating on the Word and accepting Jesus as my Lord and Savior. Those lies slowly begun to pile out of my mind. Now, I am living boldly, and a life filled with a lot of transparency. Our stories are meant to be told the good, bad and even the ugly.
Keep up the great work you have found a new friend in me.
Sincerely,
Teliah NaShonia
via beautychristrelationships
Wow!! Thank you so much for sharing your story, Teliah. So good to learn that your now living a bold and transparent life. That’s such an amazing thing. May we continue to live boldly, not only in spite but because of our stories.
Amen! So much of what you wrote has been on my heart for the past several months. I loved reading this. We need to be vulnerable and unafraid. Can you imagine an entire church congregation that lived this way? The unity and edification from it must be wonderful!
That’s a proud question, Lauren. It would certainly change so much. We would be a powerful force for good in the world. Just as Christ intended. Thank you for this food for thought.