How to support your partner’s vision, growth, and dreams.

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In yesterday’s post, we mentioned how God created Eve to support Adam. It was God who said “…it is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Genesis 2:18

The word, helper is defined as ‘one who helps.’

And comparable is something that is similar or like something else when compared.

Invariably, God created one who is like the man to help the man.

This means we women are in our element when we can help our men build and advance all that God has placed in their hearts.

However, we don’t have to wait until we’re married to show we care or show interest in the things that matter to our partners. The dating stage is a great time to learn more about the things that move them.

Understanding this does a few things:

1. We build a deeper and more meaningful connection – this tends to build trust and reciprocity.
2. We are aware of our role and what may be required of us as helpers.
3. we check our alignment – Bible says in Amos 3:3 “Can two walk together unless they are agreed?”
4. Recognise our limits and learning curve.

 

How to support your partner’s hopes and dreams

We all have hopes and dreams, even if we have never fully articulated them. These hopes and dreams may have been stifled by fear, betrayals, or other issues from our past. Yet, they remain there, somewhere in the recesses of our minds and hearts.

Do you know something else?

We are usually sensitive about these things and are reluctant to share unless we feel safe, trust the other person, or are led to share.

This means that in our bid to support our partners, we must recognise that they may be reluctant at first, or reticent. This is not necessarily about us, but it calls us to remain patient and allow them to share when they are ready.

 

Here are a few things you can do to support your partner:

1. Ask questions

As you learn more about each other, ask them questions about the things that make them tick. Find out if they have a vision or plan for their lives.

 

2. Speak the truth in love.

I’ve come to believe that when we love someone, we may shield them from the truth if we believe it will hurt them. But what we often fail to remember is that holding back the truth may hurt them more. Be honest with them but do so in humility and love.

 

3. Speak words of encouragement

Speaks words of life and encouragement to him. Remind him of important truths and all he can do through Christ who give him strength.

Compliment his progress and decision.

 

4. Pray with them.

There is power when we pray in agreement.

Our Lord and Saviour said,

…If two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there in the midst of them.”

Matthew 18:19-20

 

5. Set a plan of action!

Does he already have a plan?

If not, then work with him to create a simple and implementable plan.

 

6. Support don’t take over!

In yesterday’s post, we talked about how we women tend to take responsibility for things that aren’t our duty. It is often in a bid to express our love or even our worthiness. Remember that this is about him not you. It’s about what God has placed in his heart. You cannot leave his life for him neither can you force him.

7. Check their progress

No, I am not asking you to become a monitoring spirit (aka busybody), but rather check in periodically (and not invasively) on their progress. If you both have a good system of interaction, you may find them sharing updates without you having to prompt them.

 

Words to avoid in your interactions:

“You should have…”

“I told you so…”

“How come you don’t listen?”

“See how so so did his, you should do that.”

 

PRAYER

Father, thank you for the privilege to support and help [name] in his journey.

Lord, I pray that you will grant me the grace, wisdom, and humility to execute my role well. Let me be who you want me to be in his life, in this season. May I not seek to make it about myself, or seek to hide your truth from him. Father, I thank you because I believe you will continue to build us up in the knowledge and truth of your word. Amen