For the single woman who longs for her own child.

 

Dear Sis,

It’s been a little while. How are you doing…really doing?

I know that since you were a little girl, you have had a desire to be a mother. You played with your dolls and were the mother hen to the neighborhood kids.

Even as you grew older, you were always the one checking in, taking care of everyone. Without knowing it, you had, once again, become a mother to all.

And now, as the years have gone by, it seems this dream, this desire that stems from the deepest part of you remains unheard. God is silent. Your hands and womb are empty.

As your midnight hours have been soaked with tears and worries, You have contemplated taking matters into your own hands but your love for God and your desire to trust him constrains you.

Yet the wait has not been easy.

You have seen unbelievers get pregnant without a second thought. You have seen them hold their babies, care for them while your own arms remain empty. And it hurts.

I know it hurts even more because of the niggling feeling that it may never happen. That feeling that you are a lost cause. That God doesn’t care and has left you.

Sis, I cannot claim to know or understand what you’re going through. But I am here to support you through it all.

The reality of the Christian life is that we are always looking to God for one thing or another. While our experiences and requests may be different, the struggle with waiting often isn’t.

Sis, I have some good news – God knows.

He is aware of your longing. You are not alone.

The master of lies ploy is to distract us from God’s truth by whispering lies and targeting our areas of weakness. But we cannot let him. God constantly reminds us in His word that he will never leave nor forsake us (see Deuteronomy 31:6).

 

Sis, even as I close this letter, I want to leave you with the following encouragement:

There is a time and season for everything

The world doesn’t dictate this, God does. If time is in God’s hands, then nothing is ever too late. The God that opened Sarah’s womb at 75 and Elizabeth’s can do the same for any of us.

 

Wait for God’s choice

I recently heard this:

“Every child that was celebrated in the Bible was waited for.” 

Pastor Chioma Ibezim

Don’t be in a hurry to birth an Ishmael when God’s plan is an Isaac. Allow God work his purpose out.

Motherhood must not always be biological

Motherhood is a gift and not one we can only access through biological means. We can be spiritual mothers or even godmothers. There are times when God gives us an opportunity to be a blessing to other people’s children and we must not shy away from these incredible expressions of His grace.

Continuously check your motive and the state of your heart.

Is this desire for a child from a pure place or is this born of the pressures and expectations around you? When we long for children, it’s easy to focus on what we want and not think about why we want it. Take some time to be clear about the source and motivation behind your desire for a child.

Pray for strength and wisdom to navigate this season

Apostle Paul’s reminder to pray without ceasing (1 Thess. 5:17)  is one that comes in handy during life’s trials. I pray you always seek the Lord.

 

Finally, may God in His infinite mercies hear your cries and answer you as only He can. May he bless you with every spiritual blessing and give you reasons to testify of His goodness.

Sis, no matter what happens, I pray you never forget that you are loved and adored.

 

Your sis,
Chioma