In living life, I’m often caught up in my self; my needs, my wants and everything about me. And the danger is that it feels okay. It feels normal but it’s anything but.
One recurring theme I have gotten from reading the Bible is that my life is not about me. It’s all about Jesus.
He paid the ultimate price for my life and he owns my life. Not some parts of it but every part. It would be a loss if I didn’t realize the full magnitude of this or failed to live a sold-out life.
This Bible story puts things in perspective:
“There was a certain rich man, which was clothed in purple and fine linen, and fared sumptuously every day:
and there was a certain beggar named Lazarus, which was laid at his gate, full of sores, and desiring to be fed with the crumbs which fell from the rich man’s table: moreover, the dogs came and licked his sores.
And it came to pass, that the beggar died, and was carried by the angels into Abraham’s bosom: the rich man also died and was buried;
And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his bosom.
And he cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame.”
Luke 16:19-22
This is a chilling story (no pun intended). It can cause nightmares and scare us. But I believe that was not Jesus’ intention. It was not about fear but about repentance.
The rich man had been living a self-centered life.
Enjoying the pleasures of life without considering if there was more for him to do. He had not realized that God may have placed him there to be a blessing to others, in this case, Lazarus. The rich man’s wealth was not for him but to be used by God.
This story is a chance to look honestly at our lives and our motives.
To determine what is driving us: a selfish life or a selfless life.
To ask ourselves
‘Who we are living for’.
I used to be one of those who would easily parrot ‘I am living for God’.
It’s what we are expected to say but if we look deep within, we may find the truth: that we are sitting at the throne of our hearts.
In some ways, we cloak the true identity of the master of our lives. We do things that suggest it is God we are living for, we – serve in church, volunteer with charities, give generously and may have even gone into full-time ministry.
These things look good from the outside but then we forget one crucial point –
God looks beyond the external.
He looks at the heart. He peels off the flesh, the covering and looks right at our thoughts, our motives, and our choices.
Pretending to make Jesus the center of our life will not work. We may be able to fool the world but God is not fooled.
I remember a few years ago when I had to honestly revisit my life and what I saw wasn’t pretty. Though I had made a commitment to live a sold-out life (allowing God take His place as Lord of my life and subjecting every need, every desire, and everything I had to him).
I realized that when it was time to obey, I just couldn’t.
I just couldn’t do many of the things God asked of me. I felt they were too difficult. To give up money, relationships, opportunities and subject everything to his name.
I excused my actions.
I told myself it couldn’t have been God because why would he want me to let go of the things that made me happy. I wanted to be happy.
Ah! And there it was…the glaring proof that I had made my life about me, about my comfort, about my happiness, about my needs and my desires.
The problem was I felt justified in doing this. I lauded sermons out there about God wanting to make us happy. About God going about his work to ensure we get all we ask for.
But these sermons had missed out some integral parts, they had told only one part of the story and missed out on the others.
I had heard Psalm 37:4 quoted to me and I used it as my ammunition until the Holy Spirit explained the basis of this scripture to me:
“Take delight in the Lord and he will give you your heart’s desires.”
I thought it was about praising God and then getting everything I wanted. It isn’t. I learned that it was about loving God and spending time with him that our desires metamorphose into God’s desires.
This was clear from reading the following verse:
“Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.”
Psalm 37:5
Webster’s dictionary defines commit as “to pledge or assign to some particular course or use; to obligate or pledge oneself.”
In other words, it means to subject our wishes to God’s will and purposes where it is no longer about what we want but what God wants for us. You can be sure that God will answer such prayers.
A meaningful life in Christ has to move from self to Christ.
I love the way Corrie ten Boom expresses this:
“Self is a tight lock. I see many decent sinners who are in spiritual prison because their self is on the throne of their hearts, and Jesus is on the cross. What liberation comes when Jesus cleanses their hearts with His blood and comes to the throne and self goes to the cross.”
Over the last few years, I have wrestled with my flesh and I have learned to let go and let God. This has been a defining point in so many ways.
We are often made to think that living for Christ will leave us bereft and penniless. We imagine a life of abject poverty, of singleness, of strife and persecution and because of many of these fears, we continually choose ourselves rather than choose Jesus.
We continually do what we call the ‘bare minimum of a Christian life‘ and for the rest of the time, we are the principal controllers of what we do.
Like the rich man, we live for life’s pleasures, we think everything should revolve around us. But life does not work that way.
In Matthew 16:25, Jesus says:
“For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.”
Surrendering to Christ redefines our lives. It teaches us what truly matters. We realize that full and abundant life rests in him, not in the things we have or do not have.
He has a path for each of us, a path that is selfless and wholly dependent on him. God wants us to live for him. He wants to be Lord of our lives, not just in word but in every way.
He wants us to enjoy a real and personal love relationship with him, where we allow him to work in and through us.
I am so glad to know that my life is not about me.
Though I will be quick to tell you that I still flounder. There are times when I still think it’s about me. Times when I know I should let go. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit is right there to help me do things God’s way. He is my strength when I am weak, he is my conscience, the one who guides me into all truth.
I don’t know what your life has been like or who you have been living for but I pray you realize that all we are and will ever be must revolve around Jesus.
He is the reason and it’s all about him.
I hope you take a close look at your life, at the things that matter to you to determine if God is truly Lord of your life.
Our Lord longs for children who will subject everything to him, who will seek Him first and allow his will to be done.
“Obedience, when it flows out of genuine love for Jesus Christ, is never wasted and never regretted.”
Leslie Ludy, Sacred Singleness
May our lives be laid out for use by our good and loving father. Amen
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