How to pray for my future marriage

Do you know that a prayer for your future marriage must start with you? It must start with a stripping away and a building up.

In this current season of my life, I have sensed the Lord remind me time and again that:

 

1. We do not understand His design for marriage.

I have learned that many of us do not know or understand God’s plans for marriage. We think getting married is all about us and our need to fulfil our romantic fantasies. Firstly, no one in all of the earth or the heavens is as romantic as our God. Check out what he did in Genesis 2: 18, 21-22 and Genesis 24: 7, 12-15, 63-67. But marriage is not just about fulfilling our need for companionship, intimacy, and procreation. It’s a means to reveal the unconditional love and sacrifice of our Heavenly Father to the world. It is an earthly depiction of the eternal marriage between Christ and his church.

 

2. We are tired of waiting.

God has shown me that so many of us are despairing of ever getting married or finding good and godly men. Please know this; there are good and godly men out there. Do not believe the devil’s lies. It’s easy to allow the narratives around us to subvert the truth of God’s word. We also need to accept that waiting is a spiritual discipline. There will always be something we are waiting for – this builds our capacity to trust God and to rely solely on Him. It is not an excuse to seek out marriage the world’s way.

 

3. We have made marriage an idol.

What kind of words do you use when you talk about marriage? Do you find yourself believing that all your problems will come to an end once you’re married? Perhaps, you have been putting your life on hold, believing your happiness is at the other end of a wedding ring.

 

 

The Impossible Marriage Test

I have also realised that part of our struggle is that getting married now looks like an impossible dream. There are so many horror stories of bad marriages that a good and godly marriage seems hard to fathom.

Is that how you feel?

Then I think you will find this next idea helpful. It’s called the impossibility list.

An impossibility list is a list of all the reasons why you think something cannot happen. Perhaps, you have been feeling this way about your future marriage, the possibility of having kids or some other aspect of your life.

I need you to write every single one of these “reasons” down.

Maybe you think you are too old, you are in the wrong country, or social bracket or have a pre-existing health condition that makes you an unsuitable bride.

Whatever it may be, just write it down.

I came up with this idea when I observed I was anxious about a certain dream the lord gave me: I had about 7 reasons why this dream seemed impossible. I’ve shared three of these reasons below:

“Father, I don’t know how you are going to do it but right now:

1. 1. I haven’t heard back from the organisation in weeks and time is running out.
   2. I have not written anything about this subject before.
   3. I don’t have the funds to take the next step…”

 

Why the impossible list is powerful.

Many times, we don’t recognize the things lurking in the recesses of our minds until we write them down. Writing them out does two things for us, it helps us:

• Understand our thought patterns.
• Identify what we need to tackle.

 

My reasons seemed too big in my head but when I wrote them out and juxtaposed them with the word of God, every single item on that list didn’t seem so scary.

Do you know why?

BECAUSE GOD’S WORD IS MORE POWERFUL THAN ANYTHING YOU COULD EVER FACE.

 

The Bible says that:

Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.”

1 Corinthians 2:9

 

Has God spoken to you about your future – your marriage, your children, your purpose and your calling? Perhaps you got a prophecy in these areas which has been confirmed yet none of it has manifested yet.

 

DON’T DESPAIR!

If God has said it, then He will do it!

 

Isaiah 14: 27 says:

For the Lord of hosts has purposed, and who will annul it? His hand is stretched out and who will turn it back.”

 

I believe that prayer for your future marriage must start with you. It must begin with you asking God to:

1. Bring your heart and mind into alignment with His will.
2. Increase your faith and expand your capacity for this new chapter of your life.
3. Allow the power of his Holy Spirit course through every cell and fibre of your being – teaching you to die to self, to live for him, and to love unconditionally.

 

He is calling us to believe his word over the things happening around us. That you’re 42 and unmarried does not mean he will not bless you with a wonderful marriage and kids.

Don’t despair! Believe!

 

If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.”

Mark 9:23

 

Here’s a prayer I wrote down after documenting my impossible list (you can use a similar one for yours):

 

“Lord, I have listed all these reasons that make my dreams seem impossible. But I know that it is in moments like these that your work is perfected. It is not for me to know the how but to trust and obey you. After all, if anyone had told me in January what sort of adventure I would have with you over the last few months, I would have laughed in their face, but you did it and I am so, so grateful. You blew my mind, and you continue to blow my mind. Thank you so much, my lord.

Father may my faith in you continue to grow and expand. May I forever focus on your word and not on my circumstances or reality. May your truth be more real than the facts before me.

If you have said it, then you will do it for there is nothing – not in heaven nor on earth that is too hard for you. Amen”

 

 

May God do this and much more for you. In Jesus’ name, amen.